#44: Working with Judgments
Today, we take a deep dive into working with judgments.
Judgments about ourselves and others can increase emotional suffering and negatively impact relationships. Judgments are often assumptions, interpretations, or myths that we add to the facts. We then tend to mistake our judgments for facts.
This episode explores how to notice all of the subtle and often habitual ways judgments show up, as well as how to shift into a nonjudgmental stance.
Show Highlights
- Using nonjudgmental language helps provide a more accurate assessment of things
- Working on reducing judgments is not about getting rid of discrimination, discernment, or analyzing
- Judgments tend to be too broad and don’t give you a path forward
- Judgments about ourselves are major pain points
- Notice your patterns around judgments – what situations do you tend to react to in a judgmental way?
- Get factual by focusing on the senses: what did you see, hear, taste, touch, and smell
- Get factual by focusing on the who, what, when, and where
- Describing consequences and emotions without judgments
- Emotions aren’t judgments
- Describing things without judgments brings down distress and helps you get into Wise Mind
- Pay attention to judgmental voice tone and body language
- Being nonjudgmental doesn’t mean we don’t describe negative consequences
- Trying to put yourself in someone else’s shoes when judgments of others come up
DBT Skills Discussed
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