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#52: Interpersonal Effectiveness Overview

This episode is an overview of the core Interpersonal Effectiveness skills in DBT, focusing on clarifying objectives, DEAR MAN, GIVE, and FAST. 

There are a lot of acronyms in the Interpersonal Effectiveness module! Memorizing what each letter of the acronym stands for, especially DEAR MAN, can help you access the skill when you most need it. The best way to memorize the DEAR MAN script is to write it out again and again until you’ve mastered it.

Show Highlights

  • What’s most important in any given interaction: your objective, the relationship, or your self-respect?
    • Answering the above question will help you figure out which skills to use
  • DEAR MAN is the foundational script
  • GIVE is added if the relationship is the priority
  • FAST is added if self-respect is the priority
  • Be mindful of prioritizing relationships above all else if you’re prone to do that
  • You have a right to set limits, make requests, and say no
  • Before using any of these skills, check in with yourself and ask, “Am I in Wise Mind?”

DBT Skills Discussed

Ask us a Question

We’d love to hear from you! Where are you getting stuck with your skills application? Ask us a question for the chance to have it answered on the podcast. Submit your question here.

Please note that questions, and this podcast in general, are not a substitute for individual mental health treatment.